(From my book of Aphorisms- 'Thoughts To Make You Think' By Helen Leigh - http://thoughtstomakeyouthink.doomby.com - Chapter One - Personal Development)
If it's your Family and Friends then you stick up for them and defend them, no matter what.
If someone is telling you something negative about them, then you stop them straight away and tell them, 'No, they wouldn't do that', even if it sounds plausible or you feel you have to be polite, Don't be polite, you tell them that you don't want to hear them talking about your loved one in that way again.
If it's your family and friends then they can make many mistakes and keep making them, and you will always be there for them, not just make one mistake and their out! No matter how huge it is.
Even in your head, if they have done something that seems wrong to you, you say to yourself, 'I know they didn't mean it', defend them, have their back, even if your hurt, say it because there are always reasons why people do what they do and perhaps you misjudged them
If they need you but you can't help, then tell them that, don't pretend you can do things when you can't, but tell them you are there for them anyway..
That's why you have Family and close friends, they are the ones you tell the truth to without consequence.
They are the ones you give and receive unconditional love from.
If someone can easily talk bad about you, cut you out or pretend they are your family but are not there for you, then they are not your family.
So nurture the relationships you do have, be the one that sets the rules of how to treat one another, show others by your example of what Family really is and what it really means.